Blogging Rules

After my last post, I learned that some family rules of blog posts were needed.

The Rules:
1) Any discussion involving body parts needs approval by at least one member of the family older than 4 (age subject to change in 2011).
1a) Body parts will be predominantly described using anatomically correct verbiage.
2) Swearing by any family member under 4 will be kept to a minimum.
3) Critiquing of "wiser" generation's childcare techniques will be attempted to be only medicinal/clinical in nature.
4) Photographs of "no one wants to see that" will not be seen/shown.
5) Any failing business ideas I come up with will be ferociously protected in intellectual property court. If you really want to fail, find your own way to do it.
6) Wooing of sponsorships will be conducted publicly through "business class" blog entires and will not involve discussion of body parts as prohibited by Rule 1 and 1a (sorry mortgage brokers).
7) A full third of quoted text will be reproduced nearly word for word. You can "quote" me on that.
8) Sexual terminology will be kept to a minimum, including made up terms such as the "Canadian Air Mattress."
9) My bowel movements are my own business unless directly questioned under oath in a court of law.
10) I will almost guarantee via virtual hand shake that you will not be offended by every single blog post.