We went to Aunt Angie's boyfriend Mike's house. I traveled in my monkey suit, literally. It's blue, one-piece, and has a monkey on it.
What am I thankful for? Grapes - seedless, quartered and served on a plate no higher than 27".
Next, Dada went and rearranged Mike's living room furniture so we could attempt a mock, homey family photo supposedly for our Christmas cards. If you want to make yourself a welcome guest, go ahead and just move some furniture around.
Then I got to put on my T-Day outfit. And work it. Fortunately, Mike had a nice stretch of hardwood in his kitchen that I could strut my stuff on. My starting rate is $4.25/half hour plus grapes.
I gave myself a tour of the staircase. It looks like a futuristic, Asian-inspired prison, but since it wasn't I was happy to see the inside.
Grammy asked me if I had been good this year. I looked at Mama, secretly pleading "Please don't blow this for me." She winked.
"Absolutely, she's been an angel."
You don't believe her? Well, I will let two people hold me for at least 8 seconds, breaking my personal record by 3 seconds, AND I will allow documentation.
First up, Grampy.
17 seconds! A new record. As you can tell by her elbow, Mama was only a foot away. Next up, Aunt Angie.
13 seconds, not as good as Grampy, but Mama backed all the way out of the frame. I watched her closely for signs of imminent departure.
You may have noticed I keep a wipe on hand. You never know when you might need to swipe a boogie away to maintain your lady-like appearance. Mike didn't seem to get it, so I gave him a personal lesson. He wasn't even using a tissue. Everyone seemed to think this was funny. There is nothing funny about snot danglers or gooey fingers.
I give my thanks to everyone.
E
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